Cinema Blunder
by Starfire1407
Summary: 'I guess I do have another softener in this world now. And this one is probably a hundred times more effective than the original one.' IkariShipping/ShinHika one-shot.


**Summary:**** 'I guess I do have another softener in this world now. And this one is probably a hundred times more effective than the original one.' IkariShipping/ShinHika one-shot.**

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**Disclaimer:**** The franchise is not owned by me. So there.**

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_**~Cinema Blunder~**_

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Why am I here again?

Oh, right.

We were supposed to be celebrating our anniversary at the movies.

Instead I'm stuck outside here, while she's sitting there and enjoying herself.

Great.

Just great.

Simply _fabulous_.

I looked at the bundle in my arms, irritated, as I recalled what had happened.

* * *

**~oOo~**

"Dawn, I swear if you squeal one more time, I'm driving back home!" I yelled angrily, even though the person in question was right next to me. She wouldn't be able to hear me over those obnoxious sounds she's making anyway.

"Oh, come on! I'm _excited_! Don't be such a meanie! Lighten up for once!" The stupid woman sang, making my eyebrows twitch even more than usual.

The grip- _**my**_ grip- on the steering wheel was becoming tighter and tighter as veins popped out menacingly and my trembling knuckles became white.

Also, did I mention how much I _**hate **_those exclamation marks?

"How old are you? _Two?_ Even our daughter probably has more common sense." I pointed at the blankets in her arms with my thumb. Even though I wasn't looking at her, I knew she would be burning with rage by now.

It's not like I wasn't pissed myself. This is all her fault, not mine. Not mine at all.

"Excuse me?!" Dawn felt offended but right now I was getting angrier by the second. It didn't help that I had already had a crap day at work.

"You're excused, now shut up!" I snapped, frowning deeply. I hoped that she would take the hint and just keep still and keep quiet, but asking for both from her is too much too.

"Hmph!" was all I heard after that and from the corner of my eye I saw her stare sullenly outside the window. She probably couldn't think of a better comeback to that. Meaning, she **is** two. Ha!

I continued staring at the slushy roads in front and tried to ignore the black aura emanating from her and the already-prickling feeling of annoyance she was bringing on. This could escalate into something much worse, but hey, this is **me **we're talking about.

…Pinocchio will get jealous if this goes on. I need to get over myself.

* * *

We finally reached the theatre. On time too. Thank Dialga. I thought we wouldn't be able to make it, what with all her squealing and the baby's giggling and my irritation.

It's a wonder that I haven't cracked yet.

I let out a big sigh as I parked the car quickly before all the spots could get taken. I'd already dropped both of them at the entrance so I took my time locking the car and all that.

I walked up slowly to the hallway after that and found Dawn bouncing up and down, waving wildly. How did Phoebe manage to stay in her arms, I have no idea. None at all.

It must be superglue.

"Arceus Paul, you dawdle too much!" Dawn exclaimed as she dumped the baby in my arms. I stared at her incredulously as she started ranting about some random thing. Man, how **do** I put up with her?

Good question. **Not**.

"Let's just get the tickets, shall we?" I said, rubbing my temples and breaking her flow, to see her suddenly beam and rummage in her hand bag.

"TA-DAH!" She proudly shoved the tickets into my face. It's a good thing I didn't jump. Now who wants the child to cry?

I wordlessly followed her into the theatre, cursing all the gods I knew.

Well, this _was_ kind of my fault… I just _**had**_ to agree with the idea of celebrating stupid things. Why couldn't we just have a peaceful dinner at home and be done with it?

"Come on Paul! Our seats are here!" She dragged me across the aisle and pushed me into one of the seats, almost into the big burly woman in the next seat who scowled at me. I grimaced as I sat down. Luckily Dawn had taken Phoebe from me before this.

I don't want to imagine the scenario which would have taken place otherwise.

"Ga?"

I slapped myself mentally for speaking too soon. Big blue eyes stared back at me innocently.

_**Too**_ innocently for my liking.

Man, that woman is quick when it comes to passing the parcel, namely, the kid.

Arceus, why did we have children again?

"Dadda~!"

…Okay, I take that back.

I sighed in defeat and slumped back.

Anyway, I have no idea what I'm supposed to be looking forward to anyway, for Dawn had decided the movie. I'm supposed to be possessing zilch knowledge of anything F. U. N.

Pffft. As if.

I smirked and settled back comfortably in the seat with Phoebe in my lap, her tiny little fingers curled around my finger, which I really have no idea how she managed to get a hold of without me knowing.

Oh yeah, how could I forget she was **Dawn's** child?

See? Logic.

As the lights dimmed and the movie started, I noticed Phoebe had already fallen asleep, with what could be called a tiny smile on her face as she held onto my finger tightly (well, as tight as she could anyway). The sight made me smile, in spite of myself.

I finally tore my eyes off of her and looked up at the screen.

Now that I'm here, I may as well as enjoy the random movie, whatever it may be.

The movie's name was— wait a minute.

I gawked at the screen like an idiot for a whole minute before blinking rapidly.

Oh.

Shit.

Why the hell do I have to _always_ speak too soon?

This was a horror film.

Which means…

My eardrums are about to be shattered.

Into a million—no, _**billion**_—fragments. Not even pieces.

ARCEUS HATES ME.

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Popcorn in my hair. Popcorn in my lap. Popcorn on my face. Popcorn on my kid.

This is **insane**.

I tried to pick and brush off every kernel from the sleeping Phoebe and ignored the ones hitting my nose.

Well, I **tried** to at least.

I couldn't really shake them off of my hair because my free hand was busy trying to shield Phoebe as much as possible and my other arm was being clutched onto by a trembling monster.

The vibrations I was feeling were far from pleasant.

Also, even the tiniest movement from me earned me a nasty snarl from the burly woman in the seat next me.

I groaned. _Why me?_

This was turning out to be the most horrible evening ever. I sunk further and further into my seat while being bombarded with flying popcorn bullets. And I'm sure I've lost all feeling in my left arm.

But right now, the other monster was my concern.

That's right.

Phoebe.

The **sleeping**, yet-to-explode, time-ticking, monster.

If she woke up, all hell would be loose.

So, the best way would be to calm the trembling monster first, while keeping the other one from going boom suddenly. I groaned.

Now I know how bomb deactivators feel. Though I'd gladly exchange our situations now.

…Not really. But you get me.

"Dawn? Hey, Dawn. Calm down for Palkia's sake." I tried my best to comfort her with a useless arm nudging her being my only option.

She continued to blubber, stuff popcorn rapidly into her mouth (with most of them hitting me) _**and**_ cling to my arm, all at the same time. This woman is indeed remarkable, although annoying to the breaking point of annoyance.

"Dawn, please," I tried again, albeit unsuccessfully. This is harder than I thought it would be.

Harder than dealing with an Ursaring's mood swings.

The next thing I knew, I wanted to cut off my ears and throw them into a random Spacial Rend.

Dawn opened her mouth and screamed. It was a mix of blood-curdling, bone-chilling and fuse-blowing.

…I lost my cool.

But before I could do anything, big blue eyes opened and the small pink mouth trembled, and suddenly it felt like the whole world was in slow motion.

Just a few seconds now.

_No. No!_

Three.

Two.

One.

This is exactly why I hate outings so much.

**~oOo~**

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This is how I ended up outside the theatre, fuming while simultaneously rocking and cooing a crying baby to sleep and enduring curious glances in shame at the same time.

Being kicked out of the theatre is indeed shameful.

_**Heck, I have never felt this embarrassed in my entire life!**_

Once I get my hands on that woman—

"Hey, Paul!" I cringed. The voice made me want a hole to come out of nowhere and swallow me into it.

Reggie.

Out of thin air.

At the worst time and place possible.

How _convenient_.

_Of all the damn random things, why-_

"Fancy meeting you here! Hey there, my little Phoebie-poo~!" I glared at the idiot as he tried to stick a finger into the blankets and tickle my kid.

_**My**_ kid.

The kid _**I've**_ been trying to calm down for such a long time and this _**fool **_has to come now and spoil everything. But with my hands full, I could only possibly bite his finger off.

…Which I wouldn't do even in a million years.

I tried to pull Phoebe away from him as much as possible, but the damned leech just couldn't be shook off easily.

I thought of kicking him away, but decided against it.

_Get lost. Now!_ Was what I wanted to scream, but I held my tongue and gritted my teeth instead, silently willing him to disappear or just go back to his boy- I mean,_ girl_friend.

"Oh, and about that before… well, that's what he said! Toodles~!" And he skipped away into the safety of the other hall. I stared in confusion for a second there before it sunk into me.

I swore.

Damn that bastard.

Damn him. Damn it all. Damn everything and everyone.

What was more embarrassing was that I must have been mumbling aloud.

Hearing a gurgle, I looked down, cutting my frenzied self-ranting short and saw Phoebe smiling- _really_ smiling- for the very first time.

I stared at her for a while in shock, but at the same time, wanted to capture this moment in my heart. Isn't that what parents do? I used to think it was a load of bull, but this changes everything.

I couldn't help myself.

I smiled.

She laughed.

Well, who wouldn't laugh at a haggard looking dad with his hair sticking out at all imaginable angles and popcorn on his clothes.

Still, I smiled and let her outstretched hand catch what it wanted; my own finger.

Everything finally felt at peace and my weariness began ebbing away as I started losing track of my surroundings.

We stayed like that for a long time before my bubble was _shattered_—yes, shattered- by a shrill holler.

A holler which threatened to make my blood pressure go up again. Suddenly, all my tiredness fell on me like a pile of bricks. I sighed.

"Hey, Pau-_ul_! Let's go home! The movie has ended!" The minute she saw me, her eyes widened and then she burst out laughing but I was too tired to even glare at her properly.

This sucks. Big time.

I followed her back to the car, turning a deaf ear to her babbling about how awesome the movie was and how handsome the hero was and how awful it was that the monster ate the lovers—

…I don't think I want to know. It'll just get my fuse to blow.

Permanently.

So I kept my mouth shut till we reached the car. I shoved a hand in my pocket and tossed the keys to her. Dawn fumbled in surprise as she clumsily caught hold of the keychain at the last second.

An inch from her nose to be exact.

Ignoring her _"You did that on purpose!"_ screech, I went around and got in. She continued mumbling and started the car.

I stared at the tiny little bundle in my arms throughout the drive, tuning out Dawn's commentary on the movie and how embarrassed she was.

…That should have been _my_ line.

But my eyelids felt heavy and it was getting harder and harder to stay awake. I couldn't be bothered to retort so I contented myself with giving her a dark look, which she conveniently ignored.

Whatever.

The passing streetlights made Phoebe's face glow in different colors and I pulled her in closer instinctively when she twitched in her sleep, shielding her from the lights.

It felt like we reached in a just an instant and for a second there I was surprised we hadn't crashed into anything. This is a miracle.

_My car is actually safe! _

I heard the door being opened and Dawn take Phoebe from me.

Nothing feels better than to hand over the kid back to the mother at the end of the day. Don't get me wrong but one really can't deny; it _is_ an inexplicable feeling of relief.

I sat there for a while before stretching and then yawned loudly, the yawn itself being dragged on for a couple of seconds. I scratched my head before sighing and got out, locked the car and slammed the garage door shut.

Scratching my back, I dragged my feet to the front door and went in. After bolting it, I kicked my shoes off in some corner, threw my overcoat on the sofa and padded upstairs. I managed to reach our bedroom but not before a small detour to the room next to it.

There she was, sleeping like an angel, clutching her big brown Teddiursa, oblivious to all the drama and trouble she had caused that evening (even though Dawn had been the trigger), but I didn't care anymore. I crouched down and brushed her hair off her face and lightly rubbed her cheek with my thumb.

I smiled as I saw her smile in her sleep.

I guess I do have another softener in this world now.

And this one is probably a hundred times more effective than the original one.

I would probably be stiff and have a severe back-ache tomorrow and be generally cranky and grumpy about it, but I didn't bother because sleep had already taken over me as my head lay right next to Phoebe, her fingers holding onto mine over her stufftie.

What I didn't notice were the eyes peering at me from the door, as Dawn looked on with a warm smile on her face.

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_**Fin.**_

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**This may feel a bit OOC but since it is told in Paul's perspective, that is, we're going about it from **_**his**_** mind, I don't really believe it to be _that _OOC.**

**Please review and let me know your thoughts.**


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